Divorce settlements, which often force the two estranged spouses to split their belongings 50/50, can be both emotionally and financially painful. In an unambiguous and ironic gesture, one man in Germany told Laura, his ex-wife, just what he thought of her – by literally cutting all of their belongings in half!

The man is clearly experienced with the power tools that he has, because he’s actually done a great job of methodically and neatly destroying all of their stuff – everything from their teddy bear to their couch to their car has been sliced neatly in half. He is selling his half of everything on the eBay online auction site, where each item has a bitter but funny writeup in German detailing how the courts ordered him to ‘split’ their belongings even though he seems to suggest that Laura had been unfaithful.

We must assume that there’s a rather upset woman named Laura somewhere in Germany trying to figure out what to do with her half of a mailbox.

More info: eBay (h/t: cnbc )

“The car is quite well preserved for its age, but there are some signs of wear. In particular, half is missing”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 1

“In my opinion, this conversion is the perfect solution for users who want to save space, but can not afford a MacBook Air”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 2

“The wheel moves despite minor limitations, and the front brake engages perfectly”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 3

“Unlike my ex-wife, I cannot say anything bad about the bed, really, have always slept well in it”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 4

“It’s the perfect phone for people who do not like to make calls”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 5

“The chairs are super as an art installation”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 6

“There’s no need for cuddling stuffed animals – for such things, there are affectionate co-workers”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 7

“Watching TV alone is already depressing enough. The device is very compact and has several inputs, but am not sure whether they all work”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 8

“In recent years, I’ve spent many beautiful evenings on this sofa with my woman. She did not find the evenings so beautiful, which is why my ex-wife now sits on another couch”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 9

“Whoever wonders where the second half is may want to check with my ex-wife”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 10

“I offer here, in my opinion, the best REM album… “Everybody Hurts” (how true !!!) and Nightswimming are the best passages on it yet”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 11

“Unfortunately, I can offer only half… But no matter, I have made sure that the best sketches are on my half”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 12

“It is considerably smaller and more manageable. In addition, you will finally be at peace with this phone: It is guaranteed not to ring and vibrate and will not play music”

Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - Literally - 13

WARNING: Video contains scenes of graphic violence against TVs and iPhones

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Husband Gave His Unfaithful Ex-Wife Half Of Everything He Owned - 14

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