FOMO is the worst, isn’t it? In a world where everyone’s posting their highlight reels, it’s so easy to feel like you’re never at the best party. So, being purposefully excluded from one can wreck your whole night.
One woman turned to an online community to vent after her boyfriend and so-called friends left her stranded in a pub, then ghosted her for the night. After going to bed hurt and confused, she woke up to a flood of apologetic texts. Then the ugly truth surfaced.
More info: Reddit
Nobody likes feeling left out or ignored, especially by people they’re supposedly close to and care about
Couple smiling at a bar while friends socialize in the background, depicting a date night turned friend outing.
One woman, who lost 3 family members to illegal substance reasons, was hoping for a romantic date night with her boyfriend after two weeks of barely seeing each other
Text excerpt describing a girlfriend disappointed after boyfriend abandons their planned date night to go out with friends.
Text showing a message about a boyfriend reassuring his girlfriend that their date night will be fun before heading to the pub.
Text excerpt about a date night at a busy pub where the girlfriend had to wait for the girls bathroom.
Woman describes feeling horrified after boyfriend abandons her on date night and goes out with friends instead.
Text excerpt showing a person explaining they checked their phone for texts and asked the bartender about others leaving.
Text message conversation revealing boyfriend abandons girlfriend on date night and goes out with friends, causing her horror.
Text excerpt describing a girlfriend hurt after boyfriend abandons her on date night to go out with friends.
Text message screenshot showing a girlfriend asking why her boyfriend abandoned their date night and didn’t reply.
Text message conversation showing frustration after boyfriend abandons GF on date night and goes out with friends.
Text on a gray background describing a woman’s experience of being abandoned by her boyfriend on date night and feeling horrified after learning the reason.
A young woman looking horrified and abandoned on date night, reflecting feelings after boyfriend goes out with friends.
At the last minute, the date turned into a group get-together with mutual friends, but her boyfriend assured her that they’d squeeze in some couple time
Text excerpt showing a girl waiting anxiously as her boyfriend abandons her on date night and ignores her calls and texts.
Text showing worry after boyfriend abandons girlfriend on date night, no answer after multiple calls made.
Text excerpt describing a girlfriend’s horror after boyfriend abandons her on date night to go out with friends.
Screenshot of a text message expressing hurt and anger after boyfriend abandons girlfriend on date night without communication.
Text excerpt showing a person realizing how messed up it was when their boyfriend ditched them to go out with friends.
Text message expressing frustration about boyfriend abandoning girlfriend on date night and not worrying when left at a pub for an hour.
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Text message explaining boyfriend abandoned girlfriend on date night, apologizing and giving reason he went out with friends.
Text message conversation showing girlfriend upset after boyfriend abandons her on date night without any text.
Text excerpt about a girlfriend horrified after boyfriend abandons her on date night and goes out with friends.
Young woman at home looking horrified while reading something on her smartphone about boyfriend abandoning girlfriend on date night
After she got back from using the bathrooms, her friends and boyfriend had vanished, and nobody was answering her calls or texts, so she went home hurt and confused
Text message apology from boyfriend after ditching girlfriend on date night, causing her to feel horrified and annoyed.
Text expressing doubt about overreacting and whether to forgive boyfriend or end relationship, seeking advice.
Text explaining a boyfriend abandoning his girlfriend on date night to hang out with friends, causing her distress and confusion.
Text message update revealing boyfriend and friends purposely ditching girlfriend on date night causing her horror and disappointment.
Alt text: Woman horrified after boyfriend abandons her on date night to go out with friends for illegal activities.
Text excerpt about a girlfriend confronting her boyfriend who abandons her on date night to go out with friends.
Text excerpt about family history and poor excuse, reflecting on boyfriend abandoning girlfriend on date night and reason revealed.
Text excerpt showing a woman’s feelings after her boyfriend abandons her on date night to go out with friends.
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Text excerpt from a message about caring if friends were safe despite doing illegal stuff, expressing concern and honesty.
She woke up to a flood of apologetic texts from her boyfriend, but another friend confessed they’d ditched her to take illegal substances, so she dumped her boyfriend and cut everyone off
What was supposed to be a rare, romantic date night turned into a surprise group hang, but the original poster’s (OP) boyfriend promised they’d still squeeze in some couple time. Spoiler: they didn’t. After barely ten minutes in a crowded bathroom line, she emerged to find her boyfriend gone, friends vanished, and zero explanations.
Now stranded because he drove her, she faced a grim choice: walk alone at night or Uber it. She texted, called, panicked, but nothing. Eventually she went home, only to discover via Facebook photos that the group wasn’t even at the planned club, meaning she could’ve searched all night like a rejected rom com extra in heels.
By morning, apologies had flooded in. The excuse? The bartender was supposed to relay the message, and the club was “too loud” to hear their phones . Then the real truth dropped: they ditched her on purpose to do hard illegal substances, deciding she’d “ruin the vibe,” and calling it a favor because of her family history with tragic illegal substance losses.
For OP, that was the final straw. She called him up, he admitted guilt, and, under pressure, confessed they’d all ignored her just to party guilt-free. So, she did the healthiest thing possible – dumped him on the spot, cut off the whole bunch, and selected self-respect. Because with friends like that, who needs enemies, right?
Let’s be honest, you can’t really blame OP for going scorched earth on the whole mess. What a way to find out the people you care most about don’t give a hoot about you. If you’ve ever been through something like OP did, you can probably relate, and medical science has some interesting things to say about it.
Young woman looking horrified and stressed while holding her phone, reflecting boyfriend abandoning her on date night.
The experts at Psychology Today say that social rejection activates areas in the brain which are also involved in processing physical pain, so being iced out like OP was stings because your brain literally lights up in the same places as when you’re physically hurt. Wild.
This goes way back. Because our ancestors needed groups to survive, evolution wired our brains to treat threats to social connections like threats to the body itself. End result? When you’re excluded, your nervous system responds with distress signals very much like those for injury.
In her interview with VeryWellMind , Melissa Legere, Clinical Director and co-founder of California Behavioral Health, says the fear of being excluded “usually comes from a mix of wanting to ‘fit in’ and the anxiety that you might be left out of something important.”
If you’re being socially excluded, the pros over at PsychCentral have some strategies to help you deal, including validating your emotions, reaching out (but not venting) to someone else, and interrogating your values to see if they’re still aligned with the people excluding you.
We’d say OP is way better off without “friends” that would ditch her for a night on illegal substances. As for her boyfriend, at least she bolted when she got a good look at his true colors. What. A. Jerk.
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