Family gatherings can be loud, chaotic, and a challenge to get through. When there are kids involved, some people feel it can be even harder. In 2024, 38% of Brits said they found it hard to hear conversations around the table because of children being noisy.
One woman’s solution to that problem was to ask her family members not to bring their kids to events . However, her brother disagreed, taking it as an insult to himself and his children. Interestingly, after he shared his story online, people’s opinions were split. Some noted that maybe his kids really are that disruptive, while others doubted whether he told the whole truth.
A dad was told “no kids” at family gatherings by his sister
Family sitting together at home with woman setting no kids allowed rule, brother feeling targeted in family dispute.
Although she tried to be polite about it, he still got offended, wondering how he should break the news to his 6-year-old
Woman tells family no kids allowed in her home, brother feels targeted at family gatherings with children present.
Woman tells family no kids allowed in her home, brother feels targeted over family gathering rules.
Boy sitting on couch hugging a pillow, looking upset inside a home where no kids are allowed.
Text expressing concern about how excluding children affects family relationships and causes emotional harm to sensitive kids.
Text discussing a woman’s no kids allowed rule, with her brother feeling targeted by the family restriction.
Woman tells family no kids allowed in her home, brother feels targeted and faces family pressure.
Young woman in a white shirt sitting on a couch, looking uncertain while gesturing her hands about no kids allowed in her home.
Text excerpt about a woman setting childfree boundaries in her home, causing family tension, especially with her brother.
Text discussing a woman telling family no kids allowed in her home, causing brother to feel targeted.
Being at family gatherings helps children improve their social skills and benefits their emotional development
Family events without children might be becoming the norm. That’s especially true for weddings. A whopping 79.5% of weddings in 2024 were planned to be child-free , according to this New York Times article .
Sure, kids at a party or an event can be a handful. They’re not exactly synonymous with order: they shout, break things, and say inappropriate things at the wrong time. However, banning children from attending family gatherings may seem like a good idea to the adults at the moment. In the long run, however, it’s not very beneficial.
Research shows that when children don’t attend family functions, it can lead to them exhibiting more problematic behavior. One study found that children who attended 20 family events a year (including vacations and celebrations) were three times less likely to act in problematic ways and were more prosocial. Those who attended only 10 such events were more likely to have behavioral problems.
Family gatherings are where children learn about social norms, understand how to adapt, and develop prosocial skills. According to another 2019 study, annual events contribute to children’s enhanced social adjustment and even emotional well-being .
“We found that children who came from families with numerous experiences of annual events were more likely to have higher prosocial behavior and were less likely to have externalizing or internalizing problems,” the authors of the study write.
Children are getting banned from more and more public spaces, defining society’s views toward children
Lately, it seems, children are unwelcome in most places. While the commenters under this story were right to say that the world doesn’t revolve around one parent’s child, our society’s increasing general dislike of children is something to be discussed.
In fact, it’s becoming quite common for children to be banned from social spaces. In France, for example, many hotels and resorts have adopted a child-free policy. It’s estimated that child-free establishments make up around 3-5% of the tourism sector. The French government is set to take action, saying that such rules are “organising society around people’s intolerance of others” and “institutionalise and legitimise intolerance.”
In South Korea, some cafes and other urban spaces have adopted “no-kids” zones, effectively banning all children, not just unruly ones. Experts argue that such policies “intensify unwelcoming sentiments toward children and parents.” Mothers are especially affected, as they report feeling unwelcome more often than fathers.
Research shows that children are increasingly disappearing from public spaces. Whether because their parents deem them unsafe or because they just couldn’t be bothered, many children spend most of their time at home and in front of the screen.
“Children are only fully accepted if they remain discreet, docile, and almost invisible,” Sylvain Wagnon, Professor of Education Sciences at the University of Montpellier, writes , “which severely limits their freedom of expression and existence in public spaces.”
Of course, a person is allowed to decide whether or not their unruly nephew and niece are allowed to visit their home. Yet, there is something to be said about the outdated expectation that children should be seen and not heard.
Commenters thought the dad probably neglected to mention some things: “There are missing reasons here”
Comment discussing family events and child free rules related to woman telling family no kids allowed in her home.
Text discussing a woman’s no kids allowed rule in her home and the brother feeling targeted by the family policy.
Comment discussing family no kids allowed rule and brother feeling targeted in a home setting conversation.
Others were diplomatic, thinking both sides were right
Comment discussing family dynamics and feelings about no kids allowed in home, with brother feeling targeted.
Comment about a woman telling family no kids allowed in her home, brother feeling targeted in a family discussion.
One person sided with the dad, but still advised the dad to consider the situation objectively
Reddit comment discussing no kids allowed in home and brother feeling targeted over family rules.
Comment discussing family tensions over hosting kid-free gatherings and feelings of exclusion involved.
Commenter discusses a woman setting no kids allowed rule causing brother to feel targeted in family conflict.
Commenter discusses family siding with sister’s no kids allowed rule, brother feeling targeted in the home dispute.
Screenshot of a social media comment where a user explains that their house is not child proof for misbehaving kids.
Comment discussing potential behavior issues with kids after woman tells family no kids allowed in her home, brother feels targeted.
Screenshot of a Reddit comment questioning if the user is a mom who believes “kids will be kids” despite responsibility concerns.
Comment discussing woman telling family no kids allowed in her home, brother feeling targeted by the decision.
Text conversation discussing boundaries of no kids allowed in home and family member feeling targeted over rules.
Reddit comment discussing a woman telling family no kids are allowed in her home, brother feeling targeted and upset.
Alt text: Online comment discussing family dynamics about child-free home rules and feelings of being targeted by siblings
Comment discussing a woman setting no kids allowed rule in her home and brother feeling targeted by family members.
Comment about hosting gatherings at home without kids, reflecting woman’s no kids allowed rule and brother feeling targeted.
Comment discussing woman telling family no kids allowed in her home and brother feeling targeted over the rule.
Comment discussing woman’s no kids allowed rule at home and brother feeling targeted by family decision.
Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing family conflicts over a woman’s rule of no kids allowed in her home.
Comment discussing family gatherings and the woman’s rule of no kids allowed in her home, brother feels targeted.
Comment discussing family tensions over no kids allowed in home policy and brother feeling targeted in the family.
Comment about woman telling family no kids allowed, with brother feeling targeted in a family disagreement online.
Comment discussing a woman’s rule of no kids allowed in her home and the family’s mixed reactions to this decision.
Screenshot of an online comment about having a small family Christmas at home with no kids allowed, causing family tension.
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